privilege

4/23

our parents were tasked with survival, while our generation was tasked with self actualization.”

how privileged are we to be able to seek meaning and self fulfillment? 

Our parents worked their asses off so that we can get good education, which will ultimately help us lead a decent life. 

It breaks my heart to see my father kill himself for work to provide for our family. And yet I complain about my life. How selfish and blind I was. I don’t get scholarship but I should have. 

Because im privileged, I have to take advantage of my privileges and work so hard so that I can someday pay back to the world and my parents. I want to tell my dad that he doesn’t have to work so hard... i will work hard to provide for my little brother. Thank you for being harsh with me because I was able to be independent. It’s all because of you. But I learned from you that managing health is strategically important because if you’re sick all the time you can’t earn money, right? How spoilt I was. I feel so ashamed. 

Yesterday, I watched the episode two of game of thrones. I was trying so hard not to cry every second. It depicted the very last night before the battle, their imminent demise. And I wondered, what would I do at my last night on this earth. The face that popped in my head was his. I would run to him, spend time with him, and tell him how much I love him. I would not want anything else. He’s the one I want at the end of the day. It’s because of him that I’m doing what I’m doing and it’s all his influence. He is the biggest drive in me whether it be love or hatred. As I watched the Arya and Gendry scene, I thought maybe that’s how I’d like to spend my last day, gently making love with someone I love. It is what it’s like to be alive.