Stop being a victim

4/30

The last day of the Heisei Era and I'm just here thinking how horrible my life is. I always try to think positively. I do my best. But I just want someone who genuinely cares about me and loves me for who I am, without any condition. I try to love others unconditionally, without expectation. Will life get better? I'm trying to make it better by choice, but it's still difficult. Hoping my endeavors will bear fruit. 

""Life actually gets better when you actually choose to make it better. That means you have to make some changes in how you experience things.

I told you that you wouldn't like it.

Right now, you are taking the easy way in life. You are identifying as a victim. Things happen to you. You don't like them, and there is nothing you feel you can do about it.

That way of thinking is lazy because you have disempowered yourself by giving up any responsibility for your life. The big downside to being lazy like this is the fact that disempowerment actually feels pretty crummy.

The solution to this is to take back control and responsibility for your life. It takes a bit of work and determination at first, but it's really not too bad. And once you get into the habit of behaving this way, it gets much easier. Plus, you'll feel much better.

So, if you're still with me, I'll share one fairly simple method for taking responsibility back in your life.

People are meaning making machines. Nothing that happens to us has any inherrent meaning until we choose to give it meaning. That's right, all the meanings you experience in your life were assigned by you. So all those judgements you made on things that happened to you such as ,”I don't like this” or, “this is bad” were choices you made. You decided that life wasn't exactly what you were hoping for. But the fact that you have a choice is the key to getting out of your victimhood.

All you have to do is consciously and intentionally choose a better meaning to assign to your experiences. Choose a meaning where you are empowered to make the necessary changes. And then make those changes because you are a responsible and empowered individual, not a victim.

Everyone has undesireable things that happen to them. But choosing to be responsible for how you feel and react to those experiences in powerful ways is what makes the difference between someone who is waiting for life to get better and someone whose life is already better.

The choice is yours.